Temptation — A contemporary one
Binary thinking
On this first Sunday of lent, the readings of the Catholic eucharist speak of the temptations of Jesus. I will like to speak of a contemporary temptation (which was always there), but augmented radically in our current political climate. It is not the temptation to compare (we always compared), but to push the comparison to the limit and make it a binary thinking.
Let me start with an example; We have a married couple, Augustine & Teresa; both of them know one of the basic rules of marriage — their spouse takes priority over everything and everyone else, and they both accept it. Now both of them find a rival for this priority. For Augustine, it is the family of Teresa — so he asks the question to his wife, your husband vs your family. For Teresa, it is the family of Augustine — so she asks, your wife vs your family. And they both not only ask the question to one another, but judges the actions of the other based on this “holy” criteria.
Some of us might jump and say, the answer is clear in both cases — it’s ‘your wife’ or ‘your husband’. I agree to that, but what is the problem? It is the creation of a binary logic to define love. Does all things Augustine does for his wife or his family have to be judged from this prison of binary? Now most of us will jump and say, No. So the point is clear, the priority of Teresa for her husband over others needn’t be framed as an opposition between her husband and her family. And the same is applicable for the priority of Augustine too.
This logic can be extended to all relationships and even to my divine-human relation. And interestingly these binaries are created most of the times out of no malicious intent. Teresa loves her husband so much that one of the expressions of love comes in the form of a binary. To a certain extent, it is considered as a form of jealous love and it is beautiful. But it is important not to push it beyond that fun part, to a dangerous horizon leading to unnecessary and unintended competition and hatred.
Binary logics are interesting and helpful for certain understanding; but let’s not use it to define.
May be, I will end with a personal example. At a certain point in my life, I had to make a choice to leave my studies and join the priesthood. There are two binaries possible there, Studies vs Priesthood, or Marriage vs Priesthood. In both these cases, I opted for priesthood. But I will commit the terrible mistake if my priesthood is going to be defined in contrast to studies and in constrast to marriage. Though I chose priesthood, I continue to appreciate studies and marriage. Or my living of my priesthood is strengthened by my appreciation of marriage and study (and not in considering it as oppositions).
How I define concepts? Ask yourself..
